Cool Breeze
Well the washroom dryer drama continues. A few weeks ago (see Breezes post 25 Nov 2003) did the long awaited replacement for dryer #2 arrived. Today, dryer #1's heater element has failed, resulting in deliverance of cool icy blast to the hands, thus making it as ineffective as the pathetic warm air puffer that is dryer #2. Wet door handle time again.
Monday, December 08, 2003
Sunday, December 07, 2003
Friday, December 05, 2003
Life in the Slow (Country) Lane
Just for a change I thought I would take the sedate route into work and travel through the country lanes of this great nation. OK, so the M25 was closed between J6 and J7, causing major South East chaos... not for this boy though... we know every back alley route to Gatwick known to Christian Man (and a few atheistic ones too). A few observations
- There is a far better class of 'school run' in Tonbridge, judging by the number 911's, Series 5's and C-Classes cluttering the suburbs of this largest Kentish town
- Cheapest Xmas Trees were at a farm just past the Mormon church in Lingfield (£1 a foot)
- Funniest name of village Award: Dunk's Hill
Just for a change I thought I would take the sedate route into work and travel through the country lanes of this great nation. OK, so the M25 was closed between J6 and J7, causing major South East chaos... not for this boy though... we know every back alley route to Gatwick known to Christian Man (and a few atheistic ones too). A few observations
- There is a far better class of 'school run' in Tonbridge, judging by the number 911's, Series 5's and C-Classes cluttering the suburbs of this largest Kentish town
- Cheapest Xmas Trees were at a farm just past the Mormon church in Lingfield (£1 a foot)
- Funniest name of village Award: Dunk's Hill
Wednesday, December 03, 2003
Illegal Tyre Grime
"SEBLING QUALITY TYRES" it says on the back of a VIKING yellow transit M25 approaching J6. Some wag scrawled "NOT" with an insertion glyph between the "SEBLING" and the "QUALITY". Amazed that
a) Anyone would actually bother to do that
b) That such a person would know how to represent textual insertion
Life in the Slow Lane
Big hellos to the driver of a silver 206 and 4x4, who very nearly made my morning by almost colliding 30ft in front of me coming unto the M20 this morning.
Now I can't use the mobile phone (see Dec 01 post), I juggled with half a dozen CDs, jewel cases and CD wallet instead. This mornings playlist included:-
Come - Fleetwood Mac (best guitar solo of 2003)
Shot by a Bullet - UFO (The greatest unsung band of all time)
Most of the Time - Bob Dylan
Devil Inside - INXS (surprised myself by timing the "HA HA HA" perfectly)
Romeo & Juliet - Dire Straits (on Radio)
There's No Home for you Here - White Stripes (longest sustained note of 2003)
September Morn - Neil Diamond
Shoot High, Aim Low - Yes
Chop Suey - System of a Down
Dumpweed - Blink 182
In fact it was pretty Dylanesque at times with bits of "Tangled Up In Blue" and "Shooting Stars".
"SEBLING QUALITY TYRES" it says on the back of a VIKING yellow transit M25 approaching J6. Some wag scrawled "NOT" with an insertion glyph between the "SEBLING" and the "QUALITY". Amazed that
a) Anyone would actually bother to do that
b) That such a person would know how to represent textual insertion
Life in the Slow Lane
Big hellos to the driver of a silver 206 and 4x4, who very nearly made my morning by almost colliding 30ft in front of me coming unto the M20 this morning.
Now I can't use the mobile phone (see Dec 01 post), I juggled with half a dozen CDs, jewel cases and CD wallet instead. This mornings playlist included:-
Come - Fleetwood Mac (best guitar solo of 2003)
Shot by a Bullet - UFO (The greatest unsung band of all time)
Most of the Time - Bob Dylan
Devil Inside - INXS (surprised myself by timing the "HA HA HA" perfectly)
Romeo & Juliet - Dire Straits (on Radio)
There's No Home for you Here - White Stripes (longest sustained note of 2003)
September Morn - Neil Diamond
Shoot High, Aim Low - Yes
Chop Suey - System of a Down
Dumpweed - Blink 182
In fact it was pretty Dylanesque at times with bits of "Tangled Up In Blue" and "Shooting Stars".
Monday, December 01, 2003
"The Future's Bright, The Future's...."
From today it will be illegal to operate a mobile phone whilst driving in the UK. However like all things in the UK, the vagueness of this particular law is comical in the extreme. For example, depending on who you watch/listen to this morning, the following facts could be gleaned, that whilst driving:
a) It's OK to operate a mobile phone if you have a hands free kit
b) It's not OK to operate a mobile phone with hands free, unless it's in a cradle
c) It's OK to operate your mobile phone with an earpiece, if you Blu-tac the phone to the dashboard
d) It's not OK to operate the phone if you actually have to hold the phone (earpiece or not)
e) It's OK to operate your mobile phone, if all you have to do is prod at the keys of the phone.
f) Some Police Forces in the UK are operating an "only warning" policy for 2 months, not issuing fines to offending motorists
g) Some Police Forces in the UK are issuing fines as of today
h) Driving whilst using a mobile phone is hazardous and a huge problem. Large numbers of people are killed each year by motorists using mobile phones whilst driving.
i) It's OK to use an earpiece on your mobile phone, for answering calls.
j) It's not OK to use an earpiece on your mobile, to make a call (unless you only prod the keys)
k) Using a mobile phone whilst driving is as dangerous as lighting a cigarette
l) There are laws already covering lighting a cigarette whilst driving.
m) Mobile phones are bad.
n) Mobile phones are good
o) Using a mobile phone whilst driving, with a bluetooth earpiece is OK.
p) Using a mobile phone whilst driving, is not OK if your parked with the engine on.
Confused? It's simple... just another excuse to squeeze more money out of the motorists and provide insurance companies with another reason NOT to pay up in the event of an accident. If road safety really is an issue in this country, then maybe a more prudent measure would be to limit the size, weight and numbers of juggernauts using the motorways during the hours of daylight (and especially during rush-hour). I'm sure the poor unfortunate soul who used to own a Black Peugeot 306 (N reg) that was obliterated, on the hard shoulder of the M25 (J5-2-J6) this morning, would agree.
From today it will be illegal to operate a mobile phone whilst driving in the UK. However like all things in the UK, the vagueness of this particular law is comical in the extreme. For example, depending on who you watch/listen to this morning, the following facts could be gleaned, that whilst driving:
a) It's OK to operate a mobile phone if you have a hands free kit
b) It's not OK to operate a mobile phone with hands free, unless it's in a cradle
c) It's OK to operate your mobile phone with an earpiece, if you Blu-tac the phone to the dashboard
d) It's not OK to operate the phone if you actually have to hold the phone (earpiece or not)
e) It's OK to operate your mobile phone, if all you have to do is prod at the keys of the phone.
f) Some Police Forces in the UK are operating an "only warning" policy for 2 months, not issuing fines to offending motorists
g) Some Police Forces in the UK are issuing fines as of today
h) Driving whilst using a mobile phone is hazardous and a huge problem. Large numbers of people are killed each year by motorists using mobile phones whilst driving.
i) It's OK to use an earpiece on your mobile phone, for answering calls.
j) It's not OK to use an earpiece on your mobile, to make a call (unless you only prod the keys)
k) Using a mobile phone whilst driving is as dangerous as lighting a cigarette
l) There are laws already covering lighting a cigarette whilst driving.
m) Mobile phones are bad.
n) Mobile phones are good
o) Using a mobile phone whilst driving, with a bluetooth earpiece is OK.
p) Using a mobile phone whilst driving, is not OK if your parked with the engine on.
Confused? It's simple... just another excuse to squeeze more money out of the motorists and provide insurance companies with another reason NOT to pay up in the event of an accident. If road safety really is an issue in this country, then maybe a more prudent measure would be to limit the size, weight and numbers of juggernauts using the motorways during the hours of daylight (and especially during rush-hour). I'm sure the poor unfortunate soul who used to own a Black Peugeot 306 (N reg) that was obliterated, on the hard shoulder of the M25 (J5-2-J6) this morning, would agree.
Tuesday, November 25, 2003
"Breezes"
After months of inactivity, the 2nd hand blower dryer, in the upstairs workplace toilets, has been replaced. Unfortunately it's much more "Doldrums" than "Roaring Forties". This results in a lottery for the users of the facilities on exit. The point at which you grab the handle on the door to exit the facilities (usually with one finger) is crucial, so as to avoid further wetness transfer. One likes to think it is just water, but the "Cocktail Peanut Bowl" urban legend is never far from thought.
After months of inactivity, the 2nd hand blower dryer, in the upstairs workplace toilets, has been replaced. Unfortunately it's much more "Doldrums" than "Roaring Forties". This results in a lottery for the users of the facilities on exit. The point at which you grab the handle on the door to exit the facilities (usually with one finger) is crucial, so as to avoid further wetness transfer. One likes to think it is just water, but the "Cocktail Peanut Bowl" urban legend is never far from thought.
Monday, November 24, 2003
Life in the Slow Lane
"Just In Time" is a supply concept. In the good old days, stores used to keep ample supplies of stock so, for example, if you desired a radiator cap for a 1974 Ford Granada Ghia 2.8, chances were you could trot along to your local spares shop of your choice and purchased said item. However, keeping stock and judging what peiople would like to buy is expensive, so that is why when you wish to purchase, say, a bottom hose for a 2001 Peugeot 307 GLX 1.6L, you will be greated with the reply "It will be in tommorrow". What does this mean for the casual reader of this column? Why am I 'banging on' about this? Well at this time of year, i.e. approaching xmas, consumer demand is high and there is only one way which your stock of artificial 5ft xmas trees is going to be transported from huge warehouse in Milton Keynes, to the distribution depot just off the M3....thats right.. hefty big juggernauts. Multiply this by say... 10,000 and it goes someway to explaining why it now takes 15 mins to get onto the M20 at J6 Westbound t 7am in the morning and another 20mins to queue onto the M26.
Journey Time: 1.3 plays of "I Am Sam" soundtrack CD.
Obscene Grime Squad
"HONK IF YOU SMELL OF WEE!" inscribed on the back of a medium sized white removal type truck, on the northern summit approach of the A229.
"Just In Time" is a supply concept. In the good old days, stores used to keep ample supplies of stock so, for example, if you desired a radiator cap for a 1974 Ford Granada Ghia 2.8, chances were you could trot along to your local spares shop of your choice and purchased said item. However, keeping stock and judging what peiople would like to buy is expensive, so that is why when you wish to purchase, say, a bottom hose for a 2001 Peugeot 307 GLX 1.6L, you will be greated with the reply "It will be in tommorrow". What does this mean for the casual reader of this column? Why am I 'banging on' about this? Well at this time of year, i.e. approaching xmas, consumer demand is high and there is only one way which your stock of artificial 5ft xmas trees is going to be transported from huge warehouse in Milton Keynes, to the distribution depot just off the M3....thats right.. hefty big juggernauts. Multiply this by say... 10,000 and it goes someway to explaining why it now takes 15 mins to get onto the M20 at J6 Westbound t 7am in the morning and another 20mins to queue onto the M26.
Journey Time: 1.3 plays of "I Am Sam" soundtrack CD.
Obscene Grime Squad
"HONK IF YOU SMELL OF WEE!" inscribed on the back of a medium sized white removal type truck, on the northern summit approach of the A229.
Thursday, November 20, 2003
Life in the Slow Lane
Grime graffiti has been low to non-existent of late, although "Also available in Grey" was spotted on the back of a grey transit van, exiting off J10 of the M23.
However today there were 24 Chimney Pots spotted on the back of a pick-up, going clockwise around the M25 between J5a (aka Clackett Lane) and J6. Journey was slow, but at least gave me chance to play "Abbey Road" all the way through and "Golden Slumbers/Carry that Weight/In The End" at least three times... made me smile.
Grime graffiti has been low to non-existent of late, although "Also available in Grey" was spotted on the back of a grey transit van, exiting off J10 of the M23.
However today there were 24 Chimney Pots spotted on the back of a pick-up, going clockwise around the M25 between J5a (aka Clackett Lane) and J6. Journey was slow, but at least gave me chance to play "Abbey Road" all the way through and "Golden Slumbers/Carry that Weight/In The End" at least three times... made me smile.
Tuesday, November 18, 2003
| Current Spin(s) aka "A Stuart McConie Moment" Tales of a Librarian - Tori Amos : Tori's children given a new lease of life. Whilst not going the full Bon Jovi route in completely revamping her 'Hits' package (re: "This left Feels Right") these songs have been lovingly remixed, re-mastered and re-recorded, to the extent that it's an essential purchase for the Toriphiles. With some new tunes thrown in and a bonus DVD edition for the die-hard completists (if you bought all 5 "Strange Little Girls" you'll get both the 'standard' and 'limited edition' versions), ToaL could be the "Collection CD" of the season. If only all retrospective releases were as good as this. |  |
| Tori Amos... simply stunning |
Saturday, November 15, 2003
Things I learned This Week
a) This is the funniest thing I've seen in years
b) Milton Keynes is a lot further than you think
c) Reading isn't that much nearer
d) That Wortip Crispy Chicken tastes as good as I remembered (recovering vegetarian news)
e) ... as did the Spare Ribs
Current Spins
Rush - In Rio : AWESOME as you would expect
REM - In Time : Best of thingy, with limited edition B-sides : Good Rarities collection
Robert Plant - Sixty Six to Timbuktu : Made me realise that RP solo career has actually been quite good... no "Burning Down One Side" or "Pledge Pin" though
Bon Jovi - This Left feels Right (Limited Edition with DVD) : Just for "Wanted Dead or Alive"
Paul Oakenfold - Great Wall : Heard the Bjork "Pagan Poetry" re-mix in HMV... had to purchase
Limp Bizkit - Results may Vary : Great album, despite losing Wes... however "Behind Blue Eyes" is unforgivable
Bob Dylan - The Essential Bob Dylan : Nice stop gap until I have the lot. No "Most of the Time" which really is essential.
a) This is the funniest thing I've seen in years
b) Milton Keynes is a lot further than you think
c) Reading isn't that much nearer
d) That Wortip Crispy Chicken tastes as good as I remembered (recovering vegetarian news)
e) ... as did the Spare Ribs
Current Spins
Rush - In Rio : AWESOME as you would expect
REM - In Time : Best of thingy, with limited edition B-sides : Good Rarities collection
Robert Plant - Sixty Six to Timbuktu : Made me realise that RP solo career has actually been quite good... no "Burning Down One Side" or "Pledge Pin" though
Bon Jovi - This Left feels Right (Limited Edition with DVD) : Just for "Wanted Dead or Alive"
Paul Oakenfold - Great Wall : Heard the Bjork "Pagan Poetry" re-mix in HMV... had to purchase
Limp Bizkit - Results may Vary : Great album, despite losing Wes... however "Behind Blue Eyes" is unforgivable
Bob Dylan - The Essential Bob Dylan : Nice stop gap until I have the lot. No "Most of the Time" which really is essential.
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